If I was your Bestfriend, I’d want you Round All the Time

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Do you currently have a best friend? Or someone you know you can depend on when times get tough, need a laugh or share a secret? If you want to find someone, most people have to wait or build  years of trust, commitment and understanding before this title is given. Best friends don’t magically appear in thin air (do they?). They usually come unexpected and are built on experiences you go through together.

How do you find a best friend?

What qualities do you look for?

Most children by the age of 3-5, according to AboutOurKids.com have developed an imaginary friend. Why are imaginary friends good? Well they usually do what ever you want, never talk back and disappear upon request. They also prepare you for when a “real” friend comes a long. If you have never had a best friend, practice with an imagery friend. Best friends talk back!

Finding the Right Person

It is not easy to find someone you enjoy being around, enjoy talking to and don’t mind telling stories to. Some of these experiences, that you cherish are not meant for “just” anyone. You want to share them with people you care about (just a little bit more than everyone else). Finding the right person is often the part most people don’t understand. 1. You can’t make someone into your best friend & 2. Don’t pressure them into doing so.

I have 4 really good friends. These are people I’ve shared experiences, stories and secrets with. They understand me because we’ve gone through most of these experiences together. We’ve bonded and created a trust that is unspoken. Years of ups and downs, and experiences that relied on trust and commitment have passed, and the outcome is people who I consider “best friends”.

I didn’t go looking for these people. And they didn’t go looking for me either. I strongly believe “best friends” just happen. It isn’t something you can’t sign up for, unless you’ve seen bestfriendmatch.com, a place supposedly that allows you to find your best friend. Pretty dumb if you ask me. Either way, it is going to take a lot of work to find this individual(s).

Where do I look?

Before you go out on a wild goose chase, look right in front of you. Give someone a chance to be a part of your life. And if they aren’t exactly what you are looking for, kindly show them by giving them less information and spending less time with them. It doesn’t mean you are a bad person, it simply means you have other things to do, and that person “should” understand that. You have every right to pick and choose who you want to share information with, or allow to enter your life (on a personal level). Never allow anyone to pressure you into doing so.

 Often people who are best friends have a variety of things in common. And sometimes they are total opposite. You can’t go walking in the park thinking you are going to find the perfect friend because you love parks. Does that make sense? No. You have to simply enjoy every encounter, and if you feel there is potential, open up a little and slowly build the trust and commitment you are looking for. WARNING: Blowing the doors off a conversation is a big no, no.  What is blowing the doors off? Giving too much personal information when not needed or asked.

What Happens When I Think They Are the One

Umm. How about ask them? May sound a little silly, but why not? At least you’ll know for sure. If they haven’t popped the question, why can’t you. The worst thing they can say is no right? Some people are too perfect to ask, will you be my friend? Better yet, will you be my best friend? When you are older it is a lot more difficult. When you are younger, you have no idea what you are doing anyways, and you could care less about the results because eventually someone will (hopefully) say yes.

Slowly give information to this individual and (IF) they share back, you have potential right away. If they do not, back off a little and see what they say next. If you still see potential, ask them a question and see if they tell you a sincere answer. If they do not, maybe they need a little more time with you to open up. Or maybe they are not the right person. Note: You can’t share information and expect information to be shared back. Most people don’t operate that way. And remember,  YOU are volunteering to share information, they never asked you to do so.

Take it slow, and ride it out. Be careful with your questions and see how they respond:

Sample questions you could use:

1. Do you have brothers or sisters?/Follow up question: What do they do for a living?

2. What do you like to do for fun? /Follow up question: Do you prefer to do this with friends or alone and why?

3. Who is the most important person in your life? Follow up question: Why?

Use this to get a feel for who the person is, and what they value in a person.

How do I ask a FRIEND out?

say-ernie-would-you-like-some-ice-cream-sherbert

You’ve finally built a relationship with your new friend and you are bored. You want to ask them to do something and you have no idea what you want to do. Before anything, friendship stuff is never usually planned. The first 2 or 3 outings are usually organized really well between the two of you. Everything else after turns into a “your going with me right?” or “I need you to come with me”. And that is what you want it to be like. Unfortunately, you end up doing things you additionally do not want to do, but more often than not you have a good time, and your friend appreciates you a little more for coming with them.

If you are looking for ideas with your new best friend here are some options:

1. Simply hang out and watch re-runs of old television shows

2. Eat ice cream/Order food and gossip (Gossip is bad, but builds relationships)

3. Make pretend you have to go on an errand to the mall or to the grocery store

4. Help babysit a little sister/brother/or animal (dogs are cute)

5. Make pretend you need help fixing something, but have it fixed before they come, offer to stay for a cup of tea or hot chocolate

Conclusion

Best friends can’t be packed and delivered to your front doorstep. If you think you can turn someone into that person you are creating a fire that is going to be very difficult to put out. Give others the time to breathe and make a decision on their own. The best friends are found through experience or surprise. Some people find friends instantly and some people need time. If you honour every conversation and interaction you have with new people, you will slowly see who you want to become closer with. With that, you have to understand that everyone you feel connected with, may not necessarily feel the same way about you. Either way, that doesn’t mean you can’t be friends.

Do you have another way of making friends? How do you know someone is going to be a BFF? Contact use through Twitter: @BeAwesomenow_ca or Facebook: BeAwesomenow . We’d love to hear your response!

Until next time!

#BeAwesome

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How to Survive the First Month of School

first-day-of-school

Is your first day of school coming up? Are you wondering what your new teacher is going to be like? What pair of nikes you are going to use to sway new friends? What parties and exams are you going to skip or make a priority? What sport teams are you going to watch or try out for? How close is the nearest grocery store, and can I make it in my slippers?

It is about that time of the year again, back to school! For me, that means new kids, new parents, and new desire to inspire young minds to believe in themselves and be nice to one another. The summer is gone, and it is back to the grind in the classroom for many of us around the world.

 

Let’s talk about September

What are the main concerns of an elementary student? 1. Is my teacher going to be nice 2. What do I have for recess? When I was little, every year I would wonder if my teacher was going to be nice, or if I had to watch out for the Big Bad Wolf, or did mom pack my Dunkaroos, or will I have to trade my sandwich with another classmate. As we get older, these thoughts continue to run through our heads, only in slightly different context. 1. Will I meet new friends or like my boss/or professor 2. I should have ate breakfast today/I need to pack a lunch.

September is crucial to your survival in your new setting. The first month will separate the men from the boys. The women from the girls. Your idea and perception of your new setting and experience will be fresh. Your ears will be alert and your mind and body will be focused on the task at hand. But for how long? Some of us will be entering a new school. Some of us will be going back to a similar setting after the summer holidays. Either way, September is the start of the “new” year. How do you have a great start?

 

The First Impression is Key

Don’t show up to school in hammy down’s aka hand me down’s. I am not saying go out and buy the most expensive pair of shoes or t-shirt, I am saying take care of your self and look presentable. Carol Goman writes, “that moment that stranger sees you, his or her brain makes thousands of computations: Are you someone to approach or to avoid? Are you friend or foe? Do you have status and authority? Are your trustworthy, competent, likeable, confident?

 The decision of others and whether or not they will like or even deal with you are made quickly (7 seconds). Leave a great impression and you are well  on your way to an excellent week during the first month of school. Say hello to your collages. Shake the hand of your professor or teacher. Really mean what you say when talking to new people. Do the little things that count. Put in the work early and everything else is smooth sailing!

 Keep smiling

monkey_smiling

Being a teacher, I understand what it feels like to be exhausted from smiling and shaking hands with people you typically have nothing in common with or have know desire to be long-time friends with (sounds cruel but it is true). You can’t be best friends with everyone BUT you can be a great acquaintance. People can love to be around you even though they never see you.  Just keep smiling, just keep smiling, just keep smiling, smiling, smiling. Know one said you had to be everyone’s bestie on the first day. Smile, be polite and shake hands with everyone (use sanitizer often). This again, goes with your first impression. People will always remember your first encounter. This will set you up for easier interactions down the road.

Stay ahead of the Game

In my first year of university (for lack of better word) I sucked! I flat-out didn’t know what was doing, decided to watch sports instead of study, went for walks instead of reading and ate cereal to distract me from assignments. To often we allow ourselves to fall behind. We overlook what is ahead of us, and hope that it will magically complete itself the night before

Surviving September is about Staying a head of the Game. Sure, your friends will want to party. Your boyfriend will want to cuddle. Your friends will want to hangout and chat it up, talk about stuff you necessarily do not want to talk about anyway. Than don’t do it! When you are given an assignment, start it. You don’t have to finish it, but at least look and see what you have to do to complete it. A lesson plan, prepare for the week. Heck, prepare for the month if you have the time. A project to fulfill, do the research. Get the resources and be ready to produce some quality work.

Make a list of priorities and “at least”get started before the week that they are due. We all know what it feels like when Wednesday comes along, and you have a 4000 word essay due on Auscultation and Bromhidrosis by Thursday. Yeah, I don’t know what they mean either.

Don’t allow yourself to get in this position. Force yourself to make a list of up and coming due dates, and get started right away. The best feeling in the world is knowing that you are done something, when everyone else is scratching to make a deadline.

For me, I make a monthly schedule, of what I want to accomplish, by priority. I take 15-20 index cards, put a hole in each  one of them, and tie a string to hold them tight. I often check my dates and make sure I am on schedule. I see priority and needs and attack those ideas first. Life is a party, you will always have time for that. Friends will understand if they are true friends. Everyone else doesn’t matter.

Conclusion

September is the start of a new year. It is not quite, champagne and balloons yet, but it represents a new beginning. Every September students and professionals go back to the grind. Don’t be that person who, talks about doing things and never get’s it done. We all talk about this person and often fall in the same category at times. Put your words into action and do what it takes to be a head. What are you going to do to make this “new”year better than any other year?

As years go by, you will slowly understand the preparation, both mentally and physically to start fresh, and get off to a good start. The only people I know that can start poorly and still win are Usain Bolt, Michael Phelps, Michael Jordan, Wayne Gretzky and Muhammad Ali. I guess and a few others. Once you get on their laugh, you’ll have nothing to worry about 😉

Start the grind early!

In the mean time, continue to #BeAwesome

The NEW WEBSITE SPLASH PAGE

Hello friends,

Here is a bit of what me and some really talented people (www.qnacreatives.com) have been working on for the best few months. With lots of help and guidance, Be Awesome is taking its level of professionalism, quality and branding to the next level. Why? Well that is what YOU deserve. The support and overwhelming messages received from family, friends and strangers (love me some strangers) have been great. We had no choice but to make this thing a little more than just a brand. We are now officially a lifestyle brand. Promoting a way of life. A purpose. Look for more exciting news to come. This is only the beginning 🙂 Visit our new Facebook page: Beawesomenow

BA:-)

BA:-)

THE TIME IS NOW PEOPLE! BE AWESOME!

Help Us Help Others!!

dark_stairs_wallpaper_84da6

Well it’s been two years now (I think, maybe a little more) since  I’ve decided to try to change the world, one T-shirt at a time. How is it going? Well pretty good! I have a family of supporters who have helped me continue this journey and I am learning and growing every day. Since I started selling t-shirts from my apartment in Antigonish, during school, I have been through variety ups and downs. Negatives that I quickly turn into positives. And great friends I’ve found along the way.

Today, I live in Kuwait (If you didn’t know already) It has been a unique experience so far. This is a little country in the Middle East. What am I doing here? Well I teach grade 2 (Not just ENGLISH/Science, Math & Social Studies too). It’s been a challenge trying to manage two separate things that I love doing: Teaching & Spreading Awesome; but I some how keep both rolling. With experience comes learning, and I do not regret taking this journey for one second.

Help Us Help Others:

I’ve been thinking lately: What else can I do to make the world more awesome? I quickly thought about it. And thought about it. And came to the conclusion of reaching out to non-profit organizations, charities and programs. I want to give 16% of proceeds, and promote and raise awareness for their causes. ALL FOR FREE OF COURSE:-)

I have a written proposal ready to be sent to all organizations that are interested. For those of you who do not know who I am, I have university professors, doctors, lawyers, ministers,  teachers, friends, parents, aunts, uncles, dogs, cats and even rabbits ready to be my reference. I have given all of them notice that individuals may call or email them. I know it is hard to give a stranger a chance, but I promise you I am sincere and will try my best to help your organization reach its full potential, if it has not already. I’m just a young guy trying to make the world more awesome.

See Links:

Current Website: www.beawesomeapparel.com

Twitter: @BeAwesomeTm

Facebook Page: GaryGrayArt 

What to look forward to: 

Website: Be Awesome will get a fresh new look thanks to the gentlemen at Q&A, Orange County, CA. A new website will launch this summer 2013! Check out Q&A on the link provided.

Awesome Logo: Be Awesome will look a little different once the re-launch! A great design has been developed and we are excited to present it to you very soon!

My Mission:

My mission is very clear. I want to make the world Awesome. If I have to go broke doing so. SO BE IT. Whether that is giving T-shirts  away. Raising money for groups or individuals independently. I am ready to put my eggs in the basket. Be Awesome will find a way to give and make people smile. You can help too! Contact: garygrayart@gmail.com for more information on the concept and ideas. Follow us @ the links above!

How can you help?:

Repost. Retweet. Share. Like. Call. Write, ReBlog. This post to all of your friends and family. Please help Be Awesome Support Awesome Causes!

Until Next Time,

Stay Awesome;-)

BeAwesome

Motivational Music For The Ears

BeAwesome: #328 Motivational Playlist

Love Music

Love Music

Please read Six Reasons You Should Let Your Child Listen to Hip Hop by Ross Simmonds. I know this is a lot of reading but it is definitely worth the read.

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Music is so much more than just sound, video and lyrics. Music has a place in everyone’s heart for different reasons; first date, marriage, prom night. If you ask someone to tell you about a time they enjoyed music, and I’m sure they could come up with something entertaining. Have you ever heard someone say they do not like music? I haven’t. I’ve heard people talk about the different genres they enjoy, but never a dislike for music (in general).

Music is one of the most powerful weapons in the world. A piece of music has the ability to easily affect our emotions. How we think, and the way we go about our every day life. Music is often written based on the lives of the artists and their journey in life. Often their journeys and struggles are the same as ours. This is one way we connect to music and the artist. Music easily puts you in a mood. It causes your mood to swing: happy, sad, playful, sexy (amongst many others). This is one phenomena that has the ability to change the world. Unfortunately we use it in a more mainstream kind of way.

Motivational Playlist

RealMusic

RealMusic

If I told you everything music is used for I would writing this blog all day. As you already know, music is used to help, encourage, inspire, entertain, religion, rights, politics, therapy, fashion, video games, movies and sports (to name a few). We use music for healing all the time. We allow music to determine our moods, and what we think about.

Motivational Playlist:

–       The Roots- The Fire

–       Eminem- Till I collapse

–       Kante West- Stronger

–       Drake-Over

–       Wiz Kahlifa- Work Hard

–       Ace Hood- Hustle Hard

–       Eminem/Drake/Wayne/Kanye- Forever

–       Jay Z-Encore

–       Roy Jones- Can’t Be Touch

–       Lupe Fiasco- Little Weapon

–       B.I.G- Juicy

–       Eminem- Not Afraid

–       Dj Drama- My Moment

–       DMX- Right Wrong

–       Eminem- No Love

–       Jay Z- Run This Town

–       Lupe Fiasco- The Instrumental

–       B.I.G- Victory

  Albums on my iPod :

Old School:

The Fugees- The Score

Cypress Hill-  Black Sunday/ Cypress Hill

Bob Marley- Legend

Lauryn Hill- The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill

A Tribe Called Quest- Midnight Marauders)

Beastie Boys- Pauls Boutique

New School:

Kendrick Lamar- Good Kid Maad City)

Maclemore & Ryan Lewis- The Heist)

Frank Ocean (Orange Channel)

Kanye West (Everything)

Motivation

Eric Thomas- Heart of Detroit (Free Download)

Eric Thomas- Blueprint to Success (Free Downloand)

What ever it is you use Music for, make sure you use it as motivation as well. In times of struggle DANCE 😉

-BeAwesome

Thoughts from a ByStander: Rehtaeh Parsons


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11:00pm

It is 11pm. And I start to think about life from a different perspective. You know, it sort of feels like a dream. Or better yet, a nightmare. I wake up every morning with a thought that life is going to be okay and that I am trying my best to make the world a better place, and you know what, I’m not. I could do more. I could try harder. I could try and do things, but I don’t. I always thought to myself, why won’t someone just do something. Why can’t people just get together and make things happen for the better. Why do we always wish for someone else to make the change, and never stop for one split second, to think about the change we can make ourselves. I take signs of struggle for granted until I see the circumstances and the results. I’m sorry. I have to change.

11:15pm

When I think about home (Nova Scotia), I think about the 4 seasons. Specifically, the cold winters and warm summers. I’d like to believe that we (use) to be a hidden gem in this enormous thing we call a world. We see the news here. We know what is happening around the world. CNN and Fox News are regular tv stations. We hold about 950,000 people (And counting). We greet everyone we see, we often smile at the person coming towards us, we yield when we are not supposed to, we make sure cars and pedestrians make it across the street before we even begin to think about ourselves, we are overly polite, we open the door for the elderly, we try to support great causes, we cheer for our local Mooseheads, we are kind and generous people. We hold superstars such as Sidney Crosby, Brad Marchand, TJ Grant, Ellen Page and Classified (Amongst others). But never really get national press. Never a trend on twitter. Never a viral post on Facebook. Until now..

Timeline Photos

11:37pm

I just finished reading an article about a young girl name Rehtaeh. The title said it all ” Who Failed Rehtaeh“. My first impression was that, “This sucks, another story about bullying”.When will it stop? Without realizing, or even noticing, I see where the article is written and where it has taken place. Again, not really understanding or taking in the entire concept of the article, I believed this couldn’t have happened in Nova Scotia. A community I walked and found friends in. A neighbourhood I went to high school in. I still could not believe what I was reading.

12:10am

I started to do more research, and more and more articles started to pop up. Nova Scotia this, and Nova Scotia that. Young girl this and young girl that.  After this point, I messaged a friend and he quickly responded with ” Pretty crazy man. Hits close to home. Too close”. Again, dumbfounded by the idea and the circumstances and issues being raised, I still could not believe Nova Scotia and this innocent girl was the centre of attention in a world wide spread of a serious cause for action. Before ending the conversation he wrote, ” It’s ridiculous man.. Society as a whole needs a wake up call”. And from that point on I said to my self “Society as a whole needs a wake up call”.

12:25am

I called home and spoke to my parents for the first time in a little while. As I spoke with them, I started to think about the value of life. And the importance of parents and friends. People you trust and understand. Before ending the conversation I finished with “I love you”, and my mom mentioned briefly about the little girl from Cole Harbour, Dartmouth area. Mom: Did you hear about the little girl? Awww, what a sin”. Me: I never really said anything. I was silent. I was thinking the same thing she was. Mom: You know, it is really sad. Where were her friends when this happened? Who really stood by her side and supported her through this? Me: Again, not really sure what to say, I remain silent. And agreed with a small gesture along the lines of “yeah, you are right Mom”. Mom: You know, your friend’s aren’t  always your friends. Be careful. I love you. And don’t take so long to call me. And don’t forget to pray (Before she hung up the phone).

1:10am

inspirational-life-life-is-short-life-quote-Favim.com-628875

A Facebook post appears ( Positivity instead of Pain) and I read it. Obviously about Nova Scotia, but something in a more positive light.

1:25 am

I read another article, this time posted about the ceremony and other leads into the case. Again, overwhelmed by the details and information, I begin to look at images of the young girl whose life was taken by society’s silence.

1:40am

I finally closed all of the articles, and asked myself what did I do wrong? Why didn’t I do something to help the situation. You are probably asking? How could you have done anything? And this is exactly why society continues to fail:

Stop being a bystander. Show some initiative and start something. We fail in helping the individuals that need us the most because we think someone else will do it for us. We continue to act surprised and ask questions like how could this happen? Who is responsible? Society must take a good look in the mirror. We are the problem. Society is the problem. The busy life of the average person. The upper class. The middle class. The lower class. We all hold a responsibility. The goals and commitments we have for ourselves do not involved helping others. Our first thought in the morning is not how many people we make happy today. We think about our own troubles. Our bank accounts. A big game or a sport. What am I going to eat for supper. A crush or a boyfriend or girlfriend. We are too busy thinking about ourselves, so we become selfish. We think we are not. But we are. We forget the importance and meaning of life. We believe other people will take care of it. How to treat people with dignity and respect. Leading by example and being there for one another. Stopping something that is wrong even if you are uncomfortable. Standing up for the right. The law. Things that make sense. Not just your friend. Not just your mom or dad or a family member. Everyone. Society. We need to start looking out for one another. If you do not try to make the world a better place through being positive: You Are The Problem. We will only surpass this idea if we come together and decide to make a change (together). Doing the little things like being polite. Making little changes like, helping the unfortunate. Saying hi to someone who you usually don’t say hi to. Opening the door for the person behind you. Smiling in the direction of the person across from you. Giving as much as you can. Trying to change or impact a life in a positive way. If we do not start trying to make changes, we will continue to be surprised by the effects of an ignorant society that continues to fail our youth and people in need. Change the way social media is being used. Post positivity. Report ignorance. Be there for one another. Be the change you want to see in the world. Don’t be a bystander.

Miss Parsons, I am sorry. I promise to try to make the life of those around me better. I promise to wake up every morning in hopes of changing one life or making somebody happy. I promise not to ignore those who are struggling and need a friend. I promise to try to make this world a better place, even if I do it alone. I promise

RIP Rehtaeh Parsons

 

Why you need to STAND UP for yourself

BeAwesome: #325 How to deal with conflict (Stand up for yourself)

SpeakUp

SpeakUp

Throughout life we find ourselves in situations that are uncomfortable. Some of us shy away from these issues and confrontations. Some of us go headfirst. And some of us have no idea what to do at all. For starters, we cannot run away every time something like this happens. At some point you need to stand up and let the person on the others side know you are not invisible. Running away is not always the best option. Sometimes you need to let others know exactly how you feel.

This is easier said then done. I know:

When you are presented with conflict here are a few reminders:

 #1. Body Language

Be confident and stand tall. If someone looks at you and sees that you are afraid or scared, they will mostly likely try to eat you alive (not literally, but you get the point). When you appear weak, the individual will try to take advantage of you. Those who love conflict search for individuals who are weak so they can feel good about themselves (Sad I know). What you do is, right away, send them a message that you are not as small as they think you are. Look them right in the eye when they speak. Listen and take in everything that they say. And get ready to respond!

BodyLanguageMeansAlot

BodyLanguageMeansAlot

#2 Respond Back

You do not have to be good with words to respond in a conflict. You do not have to be a poet or writer either. It can be 3 or 4 simple words (ie. I do not agree, or that is not very nice) If you think the other individual is trying to walk over you, tell them. Tell them that they are being mean, or that they are being disrespectful towards you. These individuals hate being told what they are, so this will give you a leg up on them;-)

FindHerOnYouTube:-)

FindHerOnYouTube:-)

#3 Voice Tone & Eye Contact

Speak clear and look them in the eyes. This will show them that you are serious and not afraid. Clarity will show that you understand but disagree or feel strongly about the situation as well. Be confident in your words.

LetItBeHeard

LetItBeHeard

#4 End the Conversation

If it is serious, you cannot escape the conversation or conflict soon. If it is silly, and for one’s pleasure of trying to make another’s life miserable, end it fast. When you allow the conversation/conflict to go on and on and on, you leave a window of opportunity for the other individual to keep going. You are allowing them to get out what ever frustrations they have on you (most of the time these frustrations have nothing to do with you, but they just need someone to pick on). Be sharp and clear. Make it quick and show them that you have zero time for verbal abuse. See ya later grumpy!

LetThemKnow!

LetThemKnow!

–   –     –     –     –     –     –     –     –     –     –     –     –

 From the very beginning you need to show that your feet are on solid ground. Here is some motivation. You should try it: Cooooolll Runniinnggg

-BeAwesome